How to Win Finals.

Someone brilliant once said "You're on the road to success when you realize that failure is only a detour." Clearly this person is above average like me and probably understands the speed bumps on this road that I seem to hit going WAY above the speed limit. In a way, it's nice, these speed bumps. They slow me down; allow me to stop and smell the roses. Despite my navigation system constantly leading me down the correct roads, I like some detours.

But I've got NO time to stop and smell the roses this week. After a semester of procrastinating until the last minute to do anything (actually, everything) school-related, I barely have time to stop and smell the delicious Dunkin Donuts French Vanilla Coffee I've got a brewin'. I gots stuff to learn, people! I gots a half a semester of statistics to add to this head of mine! Thank God I took my extensions out or I'da had NO chance.

Ok, so it is a little ironic that I have no time for roses or coffee (I lied about the coffee, obvi) yet I have time to write a blog post. It's not my fault... It's totally my fault. But I couldn't just resist this genius flowing through my fingertips!!!! Here's how it started: I just returned to my cozy little apartment after ACING my advertising media final, switched on my Scentsy so the cinnamony smelling goodness reminds me that Santa is coming, and it hit me: I JUST DID EXCEPTIONALLY WELL ON THAT TEST!

I know that most of you are shacked up in the lib (Hannah, let me know if you need me to bring you a toothbrush or some shampoo) and probably trying to procrastinate studying just like I am, so I thought I'd give you some positive advice from the desk aka kitchen table of Meghan Fab Parrish..

How to WIN Finals

Bruce Jenner comes to mind when I think of Olympic Medalists. I'm not really sure if he actually won a gold, but for precious-study-time-being-wasted's sake, let's just say he did.

That was a tangent.. Bruce Jenner has nothing to do with how YOU can do your best this finals week. I, on the other hand, have everything to do with it. Let me tell you a little about the things that are helping me do my best this week:

My Lucky Shoes.

Although they are not lucky (actually, there is no such thing as luck, only blessings) they are in fact gold AND sparkly. I believe gold and sparkles are the answer to everything. Hopefully professor will think so too when he's grading my final. In conclusion, you should get some if you want to win.

BOREDOM AND FRUSTRATION OUTLETS

Attention. Deficit. What was I saying? It's good to have productive options when you need to take a breather. I like to shop for mansions and figure out what my monthly payment would be (not in my head, with the mortgage calculator, duh!)

Colors!

Ever since I was forced to stop killing brain cells, I have advanced from fine tip sharpies in neon colors to ball point. They get the job done.. and it makes it much more fun to write my study guides. By the way, my highlighter is sparkly. AND it has mini post its on one end. Such a great multi-tasking device made by 3M.

Smart Glasses.

Glasses make you smart, so I have some.

I'd like to quote another wise man: Your Highness--the rapper Ellie and I met in Santa Barbara 5 years ago who told me "Girrrrl, if you as smart as you look, that's a winning com-bi-nation," after which he proceeded to ask for our numbers. We said no. And no, he's not famous... yet.

Delicious Tangents (in other words, white chocolate chunk cookies that were a product of hunger/distraction/my trophy wife training)

You can't have my recipe because then you will have become my competition for eligible husbands and I want every single person who is reading this to win right now!

I'm sweet.

My feel-good, smell-good, favorite piece of home decor... Scentsy

Ode to the Scentsy: Thanks to you, my home has filled up with the aroma of pine cones, cinnamon sticks, and love. And although this is as close to a winter wonderland as I'd like to get, it's that time of year again... love really is all around.

Did I say love is all around? Well wouldn't you know, just in case I need someone to talk to, I've got a few of the people I LOVE AND MEAN IT on the Lazy Sue (miss you, 3 Hill Pond Lane/Rumson family)!!!! They keep me company, and if they bug, I can just spin them to the other side of the table! Oh the joy of modern day conveniences..

Just some of my boos lighting sparklers at Club Cielo..

She left me yesterday and my heart hasn't been the same since... So I'm pretending til I get to see her again in 3 days.

Finally, the costume I wear to win: Sweats.

Somehow... Santa allllways seems to bring me velour sweats... and I never have enough room in my PJ drawer to keep them. So Santa, if you're reading this, I already have plenty of derby days sweats to keep me satisfied. BUT, I would like a shiny red Cuisinart food processor..

Overall, I have spent 1 hour and 47 minutes doing nothing productive but nonetheless fabulous. I'm not going to lie, I needed to clear my head of today's advertising nonsense so that I can now progress to teaching myself the inside and out of the modern self and hear what alllll the fun philosophers and saints have to say about it. and now, you... lucky you.... have a glimpse into the mind of a glitter-veined genius. Sorry bout it Bruce J, I win the medal this time around.

Dear Religion Final at One O'Clock Tomorrow,

Bring it. I've got nothin' but time and a lot of fun things to keep me occupied.

Love, Me

Gift Implants

You can implant embryos. You can implant memories. You can implant breasts. and with my help, you can implant ideas... Christmas present ideas...

Have you ever received a gift that you wanted to throw on the ground and stomp on? How about a gift that the giver clearly thought you would LOVE when in reality you absolutely hate? Or an item that clearly was a last minute, no correlation to you whatsoever, "I have no idea what to get this person" kind of gift? Yeah, I understand that gift giving is supposed to be a simple, selfless act that comes from the heart and doesn't have to hold any material value, blah blah blah, but some gifts plain suck. I know it, you know it, and Goodwill knows it.

Each Christmas as a child, we were urged to send a list to Santa Clause listing what we want him to leave under our tree. Despite my always wanting something way cooler than Santa's elves could ever make (I never got my pink Barbie Corvette, Rudolph), my knowledge of St. Nick was shot down early on in life: I caught my dad in his undies tracking ash footprints from the chimney to the Christmas tree on Christmas eve when I was four. He tried to convince me that Santa had just left up the chimney and he was trying to clean up his footprints and cookie crumbs, but let's face it, dad, I was smarter than I looked (and still am, kinda).

Since that dark and dreary Christmas, I had to pretend Santa was real so my brother didn't cry (he was a bit of a pansy and still is..) I received gift after gift, year after year, knowing that Santa was a phony and my relatives thinking they were soooo convincing. Ha. As soon as the true identity of Santa was "revealed," I have noticed the devastating effects of not creating a Christmas list: horrible presents. Which is why I began my mental Christmas lists... in everyone else's minds MUAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!

Side note: Thankfully, Mark started giving me the things I wanted during the year (I like to think of them as random acts of kindness) so he didn't have to wrap a present or buy a Christmas tree (very practical.) No implantation necessary.

So, present implantation.

Implantation can be taken advantage of in a number of ways. The most effective approaches are as follows.. but first, a few things to know: 1. You have to want something. 2. You have to have someone to target (aka who will get it for you.) 3. You need to be very very sneaky. 4. Creativity is key in order to make the gift giver believe it is his/her idea.

Say you want a faux fur Spirit Hood (which I, in fact, do.) Unless my friends and relatives are psychic, they have no idea I want this. I could email out a notice, letting everyone know this is on my list, but no one is going to want to buy me a $130 dollar dead animal looking hat to wear around like a jackass. This is where implantation comes in. My boyfriend of the week thinks it would be nice to get me a Christmas gift but has no idea what to get me that is within his budget (hopefully budget wouldn't be a problem with a longer-termed boyfriend.) I have a few options. When he is over, I leave the site up on Firefox so when he uses my computer he sees it. Because boys are stupid and probably won't catch my drift, it's going to take a little more work.. so, in another window, I ironically have just sent a message on Facebook to my best friend saying how cute it is and how I really want one. If he STILL doesn't get it, I have to take further action: the Colleen Adams effect. If a girl's best friend tells you she wants something, get it for her. Unless you are Superman, you probably don't know better than she does and to begin with your girlfriend probably told her to tell you (implantation at its finest, duh.) Overall, gift implanting is truly better than making a Christmas list because a) they think it's their idea=empowerment=good mood, b) if they unfortunately get you something different you won't feel bad they didn't get you what you "asked for," and c) if you don't get it from the selected individual, at least your best friend knows you want it!

;)

My Kicks

I once started a conversation at a bar by telling a man I hated his dress shoes. He ended up liking me and oddly switching shoes with me so I could demonstrate just how Fred Flinstone they actually were. I'm pretty sure he still wears those shoes (even though he promised me he would buy new ones using my guidelines) but aside from that, it started a weird habit of me judging people by their footwear.. and it works really well.

Sitting in class today, I was admiring the footwear choices of the kid who sits next to me in Finance. His sneakers made me want to vom. Like, I understand people are on a budget, but is it really necessary to choose the most obnoxious shoes to wear every day until finally he decides to buy a new pair? I honestly could have found a nice pair of converse that would have looked better at his shoe's age for half the price of the annoying skate shoes gracing his.... ew, feet.

I can only imagine what his toes look like.... and his ankles..... and I didn't even dare look at his wrists.

Anyways, his shoes sucked, and it got me thinking about what I would wear if I were a guy.

So I did some research...

First off, being a young professional, it is important to have a fabulous pair of dress shoes to wear to important functions (I'll talk about how to dress for this occasion in a later post.) Typically, black would go with the most outfits, but the color doesn't matter if the shoe straight sucks. My rule? The toe must be significantly narrower than the base of the foot, but never pointier than an inch wide at the toe. A pair of men's dress shoes should be looked at like an investment... Buy Italian leather, look sharp and be rewarded in the long run, I don't care how old you are.

These melt my heart like a stick of butter

Dior Homme Penny Loafer

Ok, so if you pay $500 for a pair of shoes, you're probably not going to want to wear them to Main Street. Although I'm sure they would repel beer and cheap shots relatively well, unless you're hitting the financial district for happy hour after work I would slip my tootsies into a cheaper (but obvi just as amazing) pair.

I have never seen a guy rock a pair of boots like Hal and Kyle Billingsley and years of observing their grunge fabulousness have made me really keen on the look. Today, while Christmas shopping at Bloomies, I just might have found my "if I were a hot guy" pair... Of course to be worn with straight leg jeans messily tucked in and the laces loosely laced. I haven't thought about it at all...

Diesel Cassidy

I also realize that, although I would probably have all the Tens at my table, these boots probably aren't realistic for the average guy.. You know, because I'm above average. Anyways, for all the Frat parties and beer pong laden events (God help me, I never went through the cheap beer stage), I'd for sure rep some sick sneakers. Not to keep throwing out real life examples of Shoe gods in my life, but never have I ever seen a guy wear a pair of Nikes like Max Rose. Yeah, yeah, I know these are old school (Max, you've got to move on from the era of me giving you excellent gifts and get some new ones) but still, I say Nike trumps all other sneaker brands..

Loved these..

New Favs. Nike Delta Force

Finally, I'm not going to lie, there's something about a guy in Uggs that screams confidence. Granted, it's easy to tell if the Ugg wearer is a complete slob, but I would obviously be the more sophisticated, "my feet are legitimately cold and Uggs are more presentable to wear out than house slippers," kind of guy. Can you say rugged chic? Scruffy five O'Clock shadow, a Vince cashmere V-Neck sweater, comfy heather grey sweats, Chestnut Uggs.. Need I say more?

UGG Classic Short Bomber

The unfortunate thing about these delicious shoes is the fact that I'm a woman... and having a closet full of sky high heels in every color gives me much more satisfaction than knowing I could style you males better than your mommy.. Sorry I'm not sorry.

The Art of Rationalization

I'm not much of an artist. I can't pick up a paint brush and create a masterpiece on canvas. I cannot act, sing, or dance. I'm artistically challenged in most ways.

But boyyyy I can shop.

Instead of being blessed with some crazy talent that is going to make me rich and famous, I was simply blessed with the ability to rationalize everything. Don't get me wrong, I will still be rich and famous (of course happiness comes first), but until I have unlimited funds, rationalization is important in order to make the best purchases, cook the best foods, and believe I'm doing what I should be doing. It's kind of like budgeting in a more fabulous way; the style I prefer.

Just to give you a little background on my above average skill, I'd like to describe a hypothetical situation in which I might need to use rationalization...

Step-by-step rationalizing:

1. Take a want and make it a need

2. Make it appear practical

3. Convince yourself it's a genius idea

4. Physically take action

I really want a new purse. First things first: I have to convince myself that my want is a need. I think back to my last purse purchase (which has obviously been a long enough amount of time to be "old" because I make the rules to this game and I said so). Based on my last purchase, I decide a different color would be the smart thing to do.. Way to be practical. Since I spend hours upon hours doing style research each week, I know the color handbag I should own this season. Next, I shop. As I explained earlier, I do not have unlimited funds. I am on a "budget." Therefore, it is impossible to purchase everything I want (oops, I mean need). This is where I really need to rationalize. If the bag is inexpensive (not likely) the decision basically makes itself. Cha-ching. If the bag is not expensive, but enough to make me check how much credit is left on my card, I have to use a technique I've explained in previous posts (see here) and decide how much I would be willing to pay each time I carried the bag. If it is reasonable and I have paid off my CC this month, golden. In the case where it isn't reasonable, or my CC is maxxed (surprise, surprise), I am a good girl and don't buy it. But overall, if I have to have it, I will. I love making the rules!

I like to think my rationalization skills have been passed down by my favorite relative: Mark Parrish. Around 8 years ago, my amazing father decided he needed someone to cook for him. Rather than running out and finding a wife (which he eventually did... leaving me jobless), he decided to start an "incentive" program for me: he tells me what he wants for dinner and I make it. The incentive? Fifty dollars a dinner (and he bought groceries, duh)...... So I taught myself how to cook.

So, not only did Mark teach me how to rationalize early on in life, but he also taught me how to have an astonishing closet, the thrilling ability to cook like a pro, and a glimpse into the wonderful world of making enough money to pay your offspring to do stuff you could probably do yourself: rationalization at its finest.

girl:phone relationships

Silly boys, we know your tricks. You're shallow, too. You love fakeness and appreciate trash over class. The penis does the picking*. And you really don't know a good catch when you find it. Although I can't get in your head and take a look around (I would absolutely love to have the worldview of Patti Stanger, male genius,) I can at least take a stab at giving you a head start in your hunt for the scum of the female sex.. You can all use a little direction.

Take notes.

Research shows that until you (the male) turn 26, you suffer from a deformity called being an immature douche bag. You should not be dateable until you hit this minimum maturity level, however, until then, for some reason unbenounced to me, the majority of ill-informed females find it necessary to have intimate relations with you. Stupidity must be contagious.

But guess what? While you act charming, chivalrous, and are convincing us to like you, we are already head over heels in love and committed to a relationship with an object that will never betray us: our cell phone.

Here's a little peep (no, get your mind out of the gutter) at just what's going on in us girls' heads by the relationship we have with our cellulars...

Scenario 1: Her phone is constantly in hand, whether she is using it or not. She is needy. I don't care if she "uses her phone to check the time" or is "expecting an important call." Having a phone in hand at all times screams clinger. You can be sure that her textback rate (TBR) is less than five seconds (which is kind of scary and a little overwhelming). Her style is fashionable and she is pretty, but her outward appearance makes up for her lack of personality. She loves animals, and if you want a girl who is down for anything from sky diving to slumming it on the couch, this is the one for you.

Scenario 2: One handed texting, often. She is cool and likes her space. This is not the type of girl who forwards your call to voicemail and then texts you instead. She doesn't need a man, nor does she want one. She prefers to do most activities by herself and values her opinion more than anyone else's. Her TBR is anywhere from one minute to ten minutes (or she is ignoring you,) showing little clinginess. She is a leader, and people look up to her. Her style might not be up to par with Vogue, but she does the best with what she's got. She has a lot of male friends and will probably break your heart in the end; sorry she's not sorry.

Scenario 3: Two-handed texting within 1.5 feet of her face. She is obsessive. With a TBR of between one and five seconds, this is not someone you should not spend time with if you value your personal bubble. She does not have an individual style and is insecure, in turn needing constant affirmation that she is important to you (if you choose to have relations with her). On the plus side, she could be the girl of your dreams! 100% attention on you, 100% of the time. Get it, boo.

Scenario 4: Hand-held phone calls. She is confident and values human touch. While she probably texts often, she doesn't mind hearing a voice at the other end of the line and is not concerned about saying the wrong thing. This shows she has confidence in her friendships and in conversations with others. She is a go-getter. Even though she might be uber successful now, she is the type of girl who will be selfless in making sure you are always happy. She loves to cuddle. An S.4 in one word: sweetheart.

Scenario 5: Shoulder-held phone calls. She is busy and puts her obligations before her personal life (aka you). Getting down to business is not a bad thing, unless you are a needy boy (in which case she probably shouldn't date you either). With her, you can sit back and watch as she takes over the world. She is fun and likeable by all. When she goes out, it's "go big or go home," and then she will disappear into her hobbit hole until the next big event. She does not care what others think about her appearance, as long as she's content. Boys, watch out if her heels are pointy... She could walk all over you.

Scenario 6: Bluetooth/hands-free phone calls. She is wise, but don't confuse a Bluetooth girl with a goodie-two-shoes. While she might be abiding by the law and not chatting on a handheld while driving, this shows more brains than anything. She is therefore intelligent, and will probably leave you speechless with her sarcasm. She is important to many people, and is probably in some sort of clique. If you want a girl who talks when she should and doesn't when she shouldn't (aka arm candy,) this could be the perfect girl for you.

So there you have it: how to judge a girl by her cell phone. Now we're both shallow. Love you mean it, too.


*Credit: Patti Stanger

the savvy girl's guide to judging men the right way.

In no way am I trying to oppose the saying "don't judge a book by its cover."

Well, kind of. I think it is extremely important to weigh personality over looks; what a man lacks in his physical appearance could easily be made up for with a series of hilarious jokes, a great sense of style, or, say, a black card*. I think it is also important to note that sometimes, a cover is just wrong and the book should therefore not be picked up. Do not choose a "book" that has, for example, Ed Hardy on his "cover," or anything similar. A book that boasts designer labels on a clearly inexpensive canvas should be left on the dusty top shelf. Hard covers are classy. Finally, it is completely normal to read the back cover before you make the purchase (you can even do it on iPad, and Apple knows what's good).

To make up for what the good old saying lacks, I have created a possible alternative to help you lovely ladies make the right decision on your man hunt: Do judge a man by his cell phone (especially if he isn't wearing a watch and you can't see his feet).

What do I mean by this? Well, if you haven't noticed the variety of cellular phones people are carrying nowadays, you're ignorant. But if you have noticed, you will also notice the similarities between men of the same cell phone class. In my study, I have used the empirical research technique of observation. My methods? 1. See a man, 2. Rate him on the likert scale of 1-10, 3. Observe what type of mobile device he uses, 4. Enter data into my X/Y table, 5. Create a correlation coefficient in order to better describe the relationship.

I guess I do know enough to skip stats for a pedicure!

Let's get down to business. Following is a description of what to know about the [male] user of a certain cell:

1. iPhone: Not only is this a smart phone, but also a smart man. He is clearly technologically savvy, probably Chowhounds restaurants to see the best/most trendy places to take a girl to dinner (five stars for him,) and He no doubt has a Macbook on his desk at home. SO attractive. On the downside, He might or might not be a bit of a player (this does not apply to Mark Parrish) and probably doesn't think it's rude to answer a call/text at the dinner table. Be careful, however.. If His iPhone is a 1st generation or has a cracked screen, be worried. Seriously, men, if you refrain from going out with the boys one day a week (or just stop buying drinks for cheap, white trash girls at the bar), you could have probably afforded a new phone yesterday.

2. Blackberry: I know there is a bit of rivalry between the iPhone (wooooooooo!!!!!!) and the Crackberry, but regardless I will review it with an unbiased opinion. BBM is cool, so He is too. This fellow probably doesn't spend quite as much time texting, and He might possess more chivalrous qualities than the typical iPhone user. He might have Verizon (which means family plan, which means mama's boy, which could pose problems,) and therefore cannot have an iPhone (we don't want you on our service, anyways). Finally, He is probably an individual in the way he dresses and acts, even if it's bad.. I mean, Blackberries really don't think they're iPhones, and I appreciate that.

At this point I would like to quote an expert: "Boys with berries are girls" - Hannah Crockett

3. Droids, or other wannabe iPhones: {Stop pretending, you will never be up to the caliber of an Apple product} This man probably loves Miller Light and doesn't know how to appreciate a nice glass of Cabernet Sauvignon. He is argumentative. Where he dresses nice and could pull off a pink polo if he tried, he might not be the best kisser. Ladies, this is Mr. Right now, not Mr. Right.

4. Flip Phone: There are a few key characteristics to note about a Man with a flip phone.. 1. They suck, you should seriously get some sort of smart phone (cough cough, a different man), I don't care if you have Boost Mobile. 2. They are cheap, and so is He. 3. How is he supposed to Yelp where to take you to dinner with no internet connection??? 4. and No email??? He probably isn't that important in the scheme of things.

5. 2+ Cell phones: He is a smart businessman who prefers not to mix business with pleasure. In this case, a Blackberry is a nice choice (as long as it's the business phone). Microsoft properties of the phone make it easy for those men who use a PC (vom.. everywhere) to take care of business on the go, and you can have an iPhone too! He's a keeper.. Just make sure you like his facial structure, feet, and wrists before you give his genes to your children.

6. 3+ Cell phones: He is a drug dealer or sells organs on the black market. Stay away.

As I mentioned earlier, there are other, possibly more accurate ways to judge a man. Remember, keep your eyes out for nice watches (if you don't know them, Google them.. also know the bad ones**), know your CC's, and shoes are a tell-all.. And remember, if he can't make you laugh, you will in turn look bored at outings and therefore not meet your attractiveness potential. It is imperative to show off your fabulous smile and big eyes to all the other eligible bachelors in the room, or you might be stuck with Mr. Blah forever... sick.



*Business Amex is ok too, but take note: it won't get you into the President's Club at LAX. And watch out for frauds, I was recently accepted for a "Platinum" card that is black. I make no where near the minimum for an authentic Black American Express (exactly why I need a man who does).. If it's not anodized titanium, toot it and boot it.
**Fake watches are out there.. Pay attention to the sound the watch makes when he puts his arm on the table. If it sounds janky (not a nice, manly CLUNK), that Rolex was probably bought in Jamaica.

The Coolest People I Wish I Knew.

Some people are just born phenomenal.

I am one of them. Just kidding.. kind of.

But really though, regardless if a person is born in a small town and becomes a local celebrity for just being around (Arrow Grantham::SLO) or someone has super ritzy parents who help pave a way for them to stardom (Lourdes::Madonna), being super cool isn't that easy.

Storytime.

In 2003, I was a Freshman in high school and in the prime of my awkward stage. Just to enlighten you all who (fortunately) did not know me, I had braces, wore a double zero jean, and was as tall as I am now, meaning I wore bell bottom high-waters. Not to mention I was motherless and had no direction as to how to put on makeup, so I just did what I thought looked good.. It turns out I should have searched out a self-help magazine. But hey, I thought I was cool.. Fake it til you make it.

I would like to begin my rant by saying I am scared of fashion. Whether a collection was created in Paris with love or in a sweaty FIDM design studio in Los Angeles, couture makes me nervous. The first fashion house to give me sweaty palms was due in large part to a man I'm in love with named Nicolas Ghesquiere, the creative director of Balenciaga since 1997.

✔

In the words of Shae Savin, Nicolas is fierce. What I love so much about him is that you can see his inspiration in each collection. Coming from a family completely unrelated to fashion (his dad wanted him to be a gym teacher.. those would have been some fun P.E. clothes), he comes up with the most crazy/fabulous designs.. Some of my favorites of his throughout the years are below.


From left: Fall 2009 RTW (sophisticated glamour girl), Spring 2003 RTW (my favorite collection EVER-it's like, scuba inspired!), Spring 2009 RTW (I love how he incorporates shapes into his designs; see the heart?), and finally this year's Fall RTW (totally geometrical but SO much more fun than actually doing geometry).

Despite the fact I couldn't even pronounce Balenciaga until a few years ago, I am still extremely enthused by every runway show, and it doesn't hurt he's the last person on the catwalk.. I mean, hottie McFrenchman yes please!

Secondly, I would like to give props to my favorite blogger: Emily, better known by Ellie and I as Cupcakes. Cupcakes? Yes, Cupcakes. Short for Cupcakes and Cashmere.. Dot com for you dummies who don't already follow her.

She's adorable, right?

There are very few bloggers out there (trust me, I've done some research) that can put together an amazing outfit from anything super cheap to super classy. It's such a relief to see great outfits that don't cost 2 million dollars (no offense, Nicolas, but I'm on a budget right now). Also, she basically has my dream life: work at Teen Vogue, blogging daily, and amazing success. If only I could have more than 20 followers... and a photographer boyfriend to take my pics. Love you, mean it, super jealous of you Em.

Last but certainly not least, one of the most interesting people in the world: Iris Apfel. Not only do I have an obsession with fashionable old people (I have two amazingly fabulous grandmothers who completely passed on my shopping genes... and my color coded closet), but I also enjoy people with ridiculous styles like Iris. Did I say ridiculous? I meant brilliant.

See what I mean? Iris is da bomb..

One of the many reasons I find Iris so interesting is that she is her style. In an interview with Peabody Essex Museum this summer (one of the many museums who have exhibited her unique styles), she explained that her ensemble is incomplete if it doesn't scream IRIS! Whether this Iris touch is a pair of heavy matching bangles (one on each wrist), or her thick, round-rimmed signature eyeglasses, her style radiates her eclecticism.


Before I kick the bucket, I want to be cool.

"Dress gives you the opportunity to express yourself: who you are, who you think you are or who you want to be. So, take advantage of it. I hope that Rare Bird of Fashion will encourage you to be a bit creative, a bit daring and have more than a bit of fun." - Iris Apfel

Celebrate Life

For the past 2 years when the calendar hits September, Pepperdine College Republicans spend hours and hours (I've literally watched them slave for days on end) perfectly aligning thousands and thousands of flags--one for every victim of the 9/11 terrorist attacks. September 11th, 2001 is a day that will never be forgotten; the severity of what happened that morning has changed our country forever. But as horrific as that day was, it has become apparent that since then, we as Americans have come closer together and are now more united as citizens of the greatest country in the world.

Having grown up with a Navy fighter pilot father and (now) brother as well as being so blessed to have the life i live, I love America and I believe in it, especially since one day in particular: the day my brother told me he would be honored to die for his country. I, of course, was voicing how scared I am of him going to war, and his intense patriotism caught me off guard. How can an individual believe in his or her country so much that they would actually die for it? I honestly don't understand, but regardless of my naïveté, his saying that truly made me proud to be an American, as cheesy as it sounds. Now, when I drive by the sea of flags that is currently taking over Pepperdine's enormous front lawn, it brings tears to my eyes. And as sad as it makes me to think about every life that was taken nine years ago, remembering them makes me proud and patriotic because whether they chose to or not, they died for our country.

My "I ♥ America" rant might seem a little unnecessary for my (primarily) fashion blog.. I just felt a little insensitive for taking really cool pictures at such an emotional place. But although the flags bring up tons of emotion, it's crazy how much the flags make me want to celebrate life and celebrate being an American.

And so we celebrated.

♔ Perfection ♔

Chloe Cohen... duh.

So artsy.

"Which one do you think is best?" - Me
"Ummm maybe the one where I'm facing the camera.." - Chloe

☆

My favorite look book shot

My beautiful baby sister Chloe Cohen.. I love you! ♡♡♡

Go Tri Delta, Whaddaya Say?

Recently, Tri Delta had the honor of hiring Houston Costa (my new favorite person) to take chapter pictures for us at El Matador beach in Malibu. He is amazing, to say the least, and his pictures speak a thousand words (or maybe that was just us chattering girls, gaining attention from every individual on the beach). Anyways, this was one of the most fabulous bonding experiences I've ever had with my sisters, and it's that much cooler having photo evidence.

Here are some of my favorite shots...

My Bests

Our babies... Soon to be not babies...

♡♡♡

Delta Delta Delta, Gamma Rho Chapter

☼☼☼

Loveys!

As you Pepperdiners know, we are currently undergoing the most stressful (but fun) time of the year as a sorority: rush. Even though we (me especially) want to pull our hair out and give up at times, it's nice to know there is a support system of 50 girls who have your back... no matter what. I could never have had the college experience I have had without these girls. I love being a Tri Delt!

Let's rock rush girls!!!

Simply Delicious

Although lately I have been far too busy to sit down and have a truly nice meal, I would still say I eat well. Well as in healthy? I try, but well as in absolutely scrumpdidaliumptious? Absolutely. Whether it be on my way to school, when I'm home at night and have a free half hour before True Blood starts, or even traveling to somewhere wonderful, I have discovered some of the most amazing things to stuff my face with.

If you haven't met me, don't think because the food I occasionally eat may be high in caloric value or fat content, I am overweight or advocating it. I believe in living an active lifestyle (even though I am highly uncoordinated.. the elliptical works just as well for me as, say, a salsa dancing class), and not constantly being full. It has worked for me so far, and as long as I refrain from having 2 fruity cocktails with dinner each night, I am fairly good at "maintaining."

And now to the good stuff, or should I say delectable?

A few months ago, I was introduced to my new favorite snack. I might be a bit strange for feeling inclined to choose fruit at the grocery store instead of a candy bar, but regardless, this MY blog and I will write about what I find appetizing. So fruit: cantaloupe, honeydew, and watermelon are all very delicious this time of year (in fact, I feel like they're delicious all times of year, but maybe I'm mistaken) and I have eaten more of these three super fruits this summer than in my whole life. Why, you ask? A little thing called Chile Powder. Sounds gross, I know, but it's not--just a little sweet, a little spicy, a little salty, and a lot of deliciousness.

My second favorite food ithis summer was made by my beautiful step mom, Kelly. Visiting my new "home" in Missouri a few weeks ago was made 110x sweeter thanks to the frozen fruit salad she had waiting for me when I got off the plane. Although I enjoy normal fruit salad, with Missorui's 105 degree weather and abnormal humidity, frozen fruit salad was that much more scrumptious. Gold star for you, Kel!

Finally, I would like to give a tribute to my ultimate comfort (or maybe just hangover) food. In a little town called San Luis Obispo, at a little grill called Firestone, my all time favorite snack is created, perfectly I might add. Instead of sticking with making myself come off as a fairly healthy person, I am caving to describe the yummiest most amazing french fries in the world: perfectly seasoned, thin enough to be crunchy without being too crunchy, dipped in bbq sauce then ranch (yes, in that order), and finally, never ending. Lucky for me, a basket of fries supplies more than enough greasy goodness for the whole table, leaving me with plenty to take home!

Needless to say, my stomach has been plenty happy this summer, and now that I've mentioned it, I just might go raid the fridge!

Raindrops on Roses

If Julie Andrews can sing about her favorite things, I think I should be able to as well.

Tory Burch everything,
really high heels,
elephants, jewelry, beamers on wheels.
Soft leather jackets and two finger rings,
These are a few of my favorite things.

I'm pretty funny. But really, these are in fact a few of my favorite things. That was just a shortened (and musically inclined) list. I have noticed, however, that I tend to be brand loyal to a few more than a few brands.. The following are those sweet somethings.

1. I am in love with Laura Mercier makeup. I use the tinted moisturizer (you can use either oil free or original.. I don't think the original is very oily at all), thickening and building mascara that works better than every "hype" mascara I've tried, eye liner in black and brown (I lucked out and got an amazing limited time collection at Sephora), and last but not least the eye colour (they have great colors to accentuate blue eyes like mine). Even after trying more expensive makeup brands such as Dior, Mac, and Chanel, I've stayed true to mon amour Laura Mercier.

2. Ok, so it's not such a surprise, but I can easily say my favorite handbag brand is Tory Burch. (Read another one of my Tory rants here.) I've become addicted to the soft leather, vibrant colors, and gorgeous accessories. I continue to carry bags I bought over a year ago and still receive compliments on them.. My favorites are a bright red hobo with a HUGE tassel, an off-white tote with gold hardware (it can also comes with a shoulder strap--love), and my gorgeous tan shoulder bag with a gold link strap.

3. Who doesn't enjoy super-soft Michael Stars tops? My go-to for any basic tank or tee is always Michael Stars. Not only do I enjoy not having to search for my size (every item is one size fits most) but I also can't get enough of the uber comfy, perfectly clingy fits each style seems to have on me. Years ago I began wearing the shiney fabrics (mostly camisoles, I was skinny back then), but since I have began wearing more of the jersey knits. I'm not going to lie, though, I still own multiple camis and they still fit.. no shrinkage. Another plus? I literally have never owned a Michael Stars that has faded (knock on wood).

4. I have a slight obsession with Jeans.. Whether I was crazy for flare in middle school, a little more mellow in high school with bootcut, or nowadays with jeans as skinny I can find, Seven For All Mankind is my #1 brand. Sure, maybe they're not as trendy as jeans with excessive shredding or too much acid wash, but they do their job well, and I can't seem to stray far from them. Even though I've taken a liking to J Brand and Rich and Skinny in the past few years, I will still vouch that Seven are the most comfortable, complimenting, and trusty jeans on the market.

There they are.. They might not be brown paper packages tied up with string (that seems so not fun to me..), but these are a few of my favorite things! :)

Metal Detecting

Things I like that are shiny:

buried treasure

safety pins

sparkles

jet planes

quarters

necklaces

mirrors

fashion trends

Wait, trend? Yep. My shiny fetish is about to get way more interesting according to multiple designers' Fall 2010 ready to wear collections. Some include Marc Jacobs, Balmain, Alexander Wang (although he goes about it in a very funhouse/emo sort of way), Malandrino, and Alice and Olivia (duh). Although you probably won't catch me in a floor length shimmery silver Marc Jacobs gown, you just may find me baring more subtle hints of glimmer.

My favorite runway look was from Alice and Olivia. Where in the past they have focused on full coverage sequin frocks, Fall shows more subtle peeps of sequin. Love it mean it.

Zac Posen does partial shimmer equally as well layering a metallic silver long sleeve under a classic (and really cute) camel dress.

So I may have seemed a little harsh on A and O's use of solid sequin fabric.. I don't dislike it, but I love the extra touches (it must come with the extra zeros on the price tag) Balmain makes on this sexy mini..

I wasn't being too harsh, however, when I called Alexander Wang's Fall line a funhouse. Seriously. So many textures, bold fabrics (a lot of velvet), and shine. The title that comes to mind would be Beetlejuice Couture.. but it perfectly encompasses the metallic theme that is oh so amazing with fun twists!

Enough rambling. I'm just excited that sequins are here to stay (for now) and I will be able to wear metallics without looking like an astronaut! Can't wait for Fall!!

The Next Chapter..

Things to do before I start the real world (t-minus 260 days until graduation AND my 22nd birthday, yikes!!!):

1. Master tamale making

2. Travel to Canada

3. Do something scary that involves heights

4. Read a book at a bar

5. Get my boating license

6. Learn how to knit (well)

7. Watch every episode of Sex and the City in a row

8. Have one playlist on my ipod of just country music

9. Go to the beach by myself (not just once)

10. Create something wearable out of a dusty item in my closet

11. Actually find a good lipgloss shade

12. Ride on a ferris wheel

13. Be able to take Vinyasa Flow level 3

14. Save money (for good, not just until my credit card bill needs to be paid)

15. Make a vodka watermelon

16. Find something absolutely amazing at an antique store

17. Figure out what my favorite flower is

18. Purchase a fur

19. Try a snow sport (shopping and drinking don't count)

20. Visit St. Jude

"Many people worry so much about managing their careers, but rarely spend half that much energy managing their lives. I want to make my life, not just my job, the best it can be. The rest will work itself out." - Reese Witherspoon

Tiny Pies!

Fishing is not my sport. In fact, I'm not really sure I have a sport, but whatever. When my family decided night fishing was a pleasant way to spend the evening, I sat and watched from the air conditioned house. I wasn't about to get on a very rocky boat with a brother who acts like a toddler/class clown/pest only to catch slimy animals with weird buggy eyes. Sick, sick, sick.

As I sat on our extremely comfortable couch, I wondered what I could do to pass the time. Maybe a good show was on TV.. Or I could color code my closet.. I really should organize my jewelry that got tangled from the flight. Hmmm.. So many options...

And then it hit me. Here I was, staring out at the most nature I'd ever witnessed in one place in my life, watching my family putt around on a fishin' boat, catchin' some dinner. I should make dessert!


I am so domestic :)

Anyways, deciding what to make wasn't difficult at all. My step mom has made the yummiest treats lately, and I wanted to follow in her footsteps. Her cool trick? Using muffin tins. From frozen fruit salad (cute and pink and individual portions!) to gluten free blueberry muffins, I can't get the idea of miniature deliciousness out of my head. So of course I decided to make something along the lines of itty bitty treats, and pie was the winner.

My fruits of choice included blueberries, peaches, and apples. Instead of following a recipe (because I'm that cool and Sandra Lee could do it without a recipe) I decided to throw in a little sugar, some cinnamon, flour, and a few special touches here and there. I greased my muffin tins and spread out crust dough in a few of the cups. By the time I started spooning pie fillings into the crust, Kelly had come home and wanted to help! Don't worry, though, I made her wash her slimy creature hands first. We practiced some lattice tops and some cutout crusts that all turned out very cute. We put our tops on with a little egg wash and in the oven our mini pies went!

Apparently my trophy wife skills (or at least my ability to wing it on a recipe) failed because the blueberry pies bubbled over and ruined my heart and my spade cutouts.. Sad day. But the lattices turned out so pretty and Kelly and I found a use for a seemingly pointless tool we found in the kitchen!


Maybe.. just maybe.. baking is my sport :)

Walking in Memphis

Have you ever noticed the city of Memphis, Tennessee is mentioned in SO many songs? 899 to be exact (you learn something new every day). But what's so special about the "Volunteer State"? Could it be the many selfless people who give up their time to volunteer? From an hour and twelve minutes of people watching at the Memphis airport, I can confirm it is NOT famous for being a fashion capital.. Nor is it a beauty hot spot. And can I just mention I smell grease and BBQ that only makes me think of one thing: cellulite. Every woman I can see at gate C5 has hair shorter than mine, and approximately 6 inches more volume than me; I'm hoping these ladies are using new Aveda Control Force so we don't send the world into early global warming with excessive use of Aquanet for our hair styling techniques..

Believe it or not, though, I know a secret about Memphis that is much more important than beauty, fashion, or even food. It's called St. Jude Children's Research Hospital. While not necessarily a topic one would usually find on Love It Mean It, I believe St. Jude represents something that is ultimately a million times more special than all the selfish, materialistic things I usually discuss. It is a safe haven for children who are extremely sick to the point where any ordinary doctor would not know what to do next. Here, the world's best researchers work hard to develop new treatments for these extraordinary children who might not think they have a chance at life. NO child is left untreated due to a family's inability to pay. These children are stronger than I have ever been, or ever will be, and I admire them for their fight.

I'm a Tri Delt, if you didn't know.. My sorority is affiliated with St. Jude as our national philanthropy. Our chapter along with hundreds of other chapters throughout the United States constantly work toward the common goal of support the Children's Research Hospital, giving them funds so they may continue breaking through barriers to help cure their patients. In the past, we have done charity events at Pepperdine such as Fashion For Life (a fashion show involving student organizations on campus to raise money for St. Jude) and Charity Denim (designer denim sales in which we send all profits to St. Jude). It has been amazing to watch our small chapter make such an impact the national proceeds that are sent to the Research Hospital each year. In fact, our latest goal, Ten in Ten (Tri Delta pledged to raise ten million dollars in ten years) was recently completed in ONLY FOUR YEARS! It makes me so proud to be a Delta :)

Me in Fashion For Life 2007!

Even though we're doing everything we can to kick cancer, a donation is always appreciated. Visit the St. Jude website for more info.

Now that Lonestar's "Walking in Memphis" is stuck in my head indefinitely, I finally hear our final boarding call. Praise the Lord... Missouri here I come!!!!



**LOL! An airport employee just commented on my Rock Star Pedicure.. and I quote.. "Girlll, das niceeee.. Where you get dat nail polish?"

Sorry girl, only in California :)

Yumminess

The only thing I can blame my inability to blog consistently on is lack of inspiration. Just kidding. I'm totally inspired, just lazy I suppose. But as the old saying goes, better late than never. Here I am, almost at the beginning of my LAST YEAR of pretending there is no real world, beginning to blog once again.

My first inspiration for blogging today? My roommate. You may know her, and if not, I feel sorry for you. Hannah Crockett. She's amazing and a freaking crack up, to say the least.

Here she is, people.


Bombshell, right? She's great.. I'm just trying to figure out how this creature in her bathing suit looks like that with a pantry full of Easy Mac and white bread. No joke. I choke down veggie burgers, oatmeal, and egg whites only to maintain my heifer-ish figure. She could eat ALL the Mac N Cheese in California, strip down, and work it like Hannah Montana. I'm Jealous.

And she can cook.. kinda.

Speaking of cooking, I've decided what to do about the real world: I'm becoming the next Sandra Lee. She's on Food Network for all of you productive idiots who don't watch enough tv. I know I made it sound like my veggie burgers taste like cardboard, but they're actually BOMB (and almost vegan).

Here's the recipe.. Because I know you want it!!!

Fab not Flab Veggie B's!
(only 200 cals each)
2 tsp olive oil
1 small onion, grated
2 cloves crushed garlic
2 carrots, shredded
1 small summer squash, shredded
1 small zucchini, shredded
1 1/2 cups rolled oates
1/4 cup shredded Cheddar cheese (I use veggie cheese)
1 egg, beaten (screw you egg for ruining a yummy vegan dish)
1 tbsp soy sauce (I use braggs liquid aminos)
flour

1. Cook onion in oil for 5 minutes, then add other veggies for another 5 minutes.
2. Mix everything but flour together in a bowl
3. Refrigerate for 45 minutes
4. Make 8 patties that are about 1/2 inch thick
5. Coat patties in flour
6. Grill! (or if you're a dummy like me and don't know how to work a BBQ, just cook it on the stove :) )

Why I need to eat veggie burgers and make my second home the MCA gym?? A little place called the East Coast. We have a love/hate relationship. Mostly love, but my fat body wants to kick that whole right side of the country in the face. LOVE the fact that Colleen Erin Felicity Adams (and fam) resides there, LOVE Italian Ice, LOVE hot dogs at 4 am (FML), LOVE the Jersey Shore, OBSESSED with Dunkin Donuts, and LOVEEE the City, obvi.

Like, I NEED to wake up in this crazy cement wonderland. I'm in love. No hate, I take it back. I just need to take into account the high caloric value of New York food and say buh-bye to it. I'm happy with veggie b's.

HOWEVER, a few food favs will not be left behind. Park Avenue Summer = best brunch ever. I don't care how many carbs or fat grams were in the pastry selection (delish). Also, Saks 5th Ave on the 5th floor is home to the BEST frozen yogurt I have ever tasted. No joke. I would take that over Cherry Tart any day (sorry D Rock..) I want to live in walking distance from that 8th wonder of the the world. NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM!!!!!!!

Well there you have it, my life is completely ruled by the deliciousness of food; healthy and unhealthy.

LYMI!!!!

What I Love..

Brother Nick
Best Friends
Daddy
Jesus
Four Seasons
Peonies
Leopard

Fashion
Cherry Tart
Frost
Victorian Picture Frames
Trader Joes
Little Sis
Little Bro
Shoes
Pink
Pictures
Louis V
J Lohr
Asparagus
Pedicures
Cousins
Short Hair
Dress Up
Red Bull
Cielo
Champagne
Pepperoni
Gold
Texas
Gaudi
Facebook
Tommy Bennett
Color Pens
Tom Ford
Aveda
London
Pepperdine
BMW
Spray Tans
Paris
Trophy Wife Training
Shopping
Menchies
Mac
Kids
J Brand
Travel
Free Drinks
Free Anything
Roses
Reality TV
Gummy Bears
Prettiness
and that's all.

shoes, shoes, shoes.

Think about it. Shoes can tell you a lot about the person wearing them. More than clothes, more than their dog, and more than their car. Shoes are the ultimate personality give away. I mean, you probably wouldn’t see me walking around in Nikes (unless of course it is a costume party in which case it would be completely normal). Rather, I might be seen wearing a pair of Tory Burch flats, Havianna flip flops, or depending on the location some very high heels. If someone were to look at my feet before they continued up my body to look at my clothes and my face, they would probably have already guessed I would be dressed nicely and might have a cute face. But maybe I’m a bad example..

Let’s talk about a larger, clearly unfashionable girl grinding on Bobby Bottle Service at a Les Deux, you might expect her shoes to be classless: clearly inexpensive “leather” material, probably WAY too bright a color, and slightly trashed due to “going out” excessively at these yucky, totally last week clubs. Since we are confident it’s not Kelly Osbourne (she has more class than to be at Les Deux and she wouldn’t be considered the “larger” girl .. way to go with the weight loss Kelly), the shoes clearly define the girl wearing them.

Classifications:

Birkenstocks, etc. = hippy or someone who thinks fashion <>

Premier Designer shoes that don’t have designer logos all over them = classy, rich people

Premier Designer shoes that DO have logos all over them = want to seem classy but don’t but are probably rich

Converse = could be anyone. Around 60% of Americans have owned (or claimed to own) a pair of converse in their lifetime and you really can’t classify 60% of Americans into one category..

Designer shoes = girls who are working on finding funds for designer but are probably young so doing alright.

“Designer” shoes that have logos EVERYWHERE= people I can’t stand.. It’s like, instead of buying Coach shoes with C’s all over them for 150 dollars, buy two pairs of cute flats that aren’t awkward.. We know you’re not buying logo shoes because you think they’re comfortable. You don’t look cool. And stop pretending G and C stand for premium designers because they don’t, Thanks.. and sorry for that rant.

Tennis shoes = sports players or (obviously) people who work out (or want to seem like they work out)

Flip Flops = beachy people, lazy people, or not morning people (just throw them on and go, hoping they look ok with your outfit).. Haviannas are the best for that.

Wedges = girls who want to wear heels but need a sturdier “base” when they’re drunk. Please leave the wedges in their boxes until April, thanks.

Honestly, guys are exactly the same way but a tiny bit more difficult to distinguish. If you have ugly shoes guys, don’t wear them please. It is so unattractive and SUCH a reflection of who you are as a person. Sneakers you’ve had for 3 years and continue to wear need to go buh-bye. Dress shoes with too square a toe are not flattering (YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE). Inside a dress shoe, your foot does not look like a slab of meat. So stop shoving them in these giant shoes because you think that's what it's supposed to look like. A shoe should be narrower in the front than the back. Plan your shoe shopping accordingly.

Nikes are a different story.. Basketball players can wear whatever they want. Skateboarders, go for some 6.0s. But it’s when you get into the obnoxious colors, patterns and super high-tops that you seem a little ridiculous. And everyone can tell. Ew.

Anyways, this turned into Me just talking about everything I hate. Sorry I’m not sorry.

Cielo

Words are unnecessary to describe our fabulosity when we have pictures like these:

and yes, this is where we live.